Kids... So Selfish!

As many of you know, I get to work with kids all day at both of my jobs, nannying and Sylvan. Fun jobs, fun kids, good times :) I totally love doing what I do, because I get to see the "human nature" in its perhaps most "unrefined" form. It's always refreshingly shocking and amusing to see how kids reflect what all of us really are on the inside...selfish!

I've never had a problem with an 11 month old Tommy being selfish, because he's baby, he's right, the world really does revolve around him and his needs. I do get a bit annoyed when my 3 (now 4) year old Mikey tries to throw a selfish fit, though. In an effort to teach him that the world does not, in fact, revolve around him and that he needs to be aware and considerate of the wants and needs that others around him have, I've been making it a point to sometimes deny him certain things if his only reason is "But I want to!" or "But I don't want to!" It's not because I'm mean or don't love him, but because the kid's got to learn! Every once in a while, just to mess with him, I'll respond with my own "But I want to!" or "But I don't want to!" so that he'll understand what it's like to not always get what you want because of your consideration for others. I think it's working :)

It's normal for kids to be selfish when they're young, but when are they supposed to grow out of it? At what age do they begin to realize that it is indeed better to give than to receive, that sometimes one needs to lay aside their own personal wants and needs for a sacrifice of a greater good? Somehow I remember always being aware of that "self sacrifice" concept growing up. Blame it on either a "culture of love songs" or "religion", but it got the job done. About a month ago though, I had a Study Skills student at Sylvan who really got me concerned about what this world is coming to in terms of selfish kids growing up to be selfish adults... I think she was either a freshman or a sophomore in high school and we were doing a lesson on setting goals and priorities. At the end of the lesson, she needed to answer a question: What would you die for? Her answer: Nothing. To help the girl out, I asked her what she would live for instead. Her answer: Myself. She then went on to explain that she didn't think there was anything she would be willing to die for and that she was only living for herself and what made her happy. I just kind of sat there, stunned, staring at her for a minute and then just had her move on to something else because I couldn't tell her what I was really thinking: What a sad little girl... What a sad life...

Selfish people don't make very good friends, and they make terrible spouses... It's just hard to be around them, to live with them... And it's also hard for them to live with themselves... Selfish people are often negative, pessimistic, sad, lonely and depressed. No wonder, since all of their focus is on themselves... It's pretty ironic that when you spend so much time and energy trying to make yourself happy, all your efforts fall short and all you're left with is an acute realization of how big that hole in your soul really is...

So where does true fulfillment, satisfaction, love and happiness come from? Well, like Jesus said, it comes from laying your life down for others, from loving and serving others... From living an "unselfish" life... From taking yourself off the throne of your life and putting God there... Having your life revolve around Him... And guess what? He's all about loving other people :) So who would you die for? My neighbor... Who would you live for? My neighbor...