GRACE

Current mood: exhausted
Category: Life

hey guys i just thought this was a really cool poem... i know some of you need this... we all do...

HIS GRACE IS SUFFICIENT

Author: Tim Boness

[2 Cor. 12:9]

His Grace is all you need

...when your heart's in need of healing

His Grace will help you through the hurt

...of every lonely feeling

His Grace will help you carry on

...when dreams might seem the farthest

His Grace will be sufficient

...when fears make life seem darkest

His Grace will heal your broken heart

...and give you strength to face it all

The Hands of Grace will hold you close

...and catch the tears that fall

His Grace will be sufficient

...when you're feeling lost not knowing

Where the road is taking you

...or where in life you're going

His eyes see through the walls that hide you

...where you're hiding...Grace will find you

All you need for all locked doors

All you need to try once more

...And feel the hope

...And feel embraced

...In Father's love

...Amazing Grace...

THE LIFE I NOW LIVE (CONFERENCE)

Current mood: bouncy
Category: Life

IT'S HERE! WOW.... THE KICKOFF LAST NIGHT WAS AMAZING AND TOTALLY SET THE ATMOSPHERE FOR THIS WEEKEND! ITS GONNA BE SO MIND BLOWING... I'M TOTALLY EXPECTING MY LIFE TO BE CHANGED.... I'M EXPECTING GOD TO DO MIRACLES AND FOR PEOPLE TO BE SAVED... I'M EXPECTING ANSWERS TO PRAYERS, TO QUESTIONS... I'M EXPECTING GOD TO ADDRESS MY EVERY NEED AND DESIRE... I'M EXPECTING A NEW REVELATION, A NEW VISION... THIS IS SO EXCITING, I'VE NEVER BEEN THROUGH THIS BEFORE... MY WORLD WILL BE ROCKED... MY LIFE CHANGED... I WILL KNOW GOD MORE INTIMATLY THAN I HAVE BEFORE... I KNOW THIS... AND I'M ANTICIPATING GREAT THINGS....

Currently listening : Ripen By Shawn Mcdonald Release date: 07 March, 2006

I'm having more fun than you are!

Current mood: refreshed
Category: Life

Ok so maybe I don't mean it in the same context as Pastor Judah, but it's still true: Christians have more fun… way more… I mean… God created fun… He is fun… serving Him is fun! When people ask me what I do for fun they expect me to say: club, drink, party, have random sexual encounters…whatever… so when I say: go to church, sing in the worship choir, youth dance team, hang out with my friends, play games (not head games) they are taken aback… that's fun? Why yes, it is! It's the carefree, feel good, innocent, wholesome, guilt free, regret free good time basking in the presence of God and His kids J seriously though… it's the best… everyone is sober, nobody is hitting on you, no need to watch your back (or your front) and the next morning you look back on it with a smile and a clear conscience, not a hangover. I've been to my share of parties… and the ones I can actually remember are with good people, good conversations, good food, clean jokes, and no alcohol… you don't have to get drunk to have fun… you don't have to hook up with a guy to have fun… you don't have to loose control of yourself to have fun… in fact, being in control is empowering and making the right decisions is encouraging and being with people that actually care about you and your well being is wise…

Yes, I'm a Christian, but no, my life is not boring… dare I say that it's more fun than yours? It probably is… I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't go to clubs, and I don't hook up with guys… I don't waste my time doing things that are harmful to me and going places where Jesus wouldn't be caught dead in with people who don't love God. Still… I'm having more fun than you are… ;)

One of those days...

Current mood: anxious
Category: Life

Why is this how I feel right now?

"Another day gone by
And again I ask myself why
I question my sanity
Why I believe what I believe
Some might think that I am crazy
For believing in something I cannot see
So won't You now
Hold on to me, hold on
Hold on to me, yeah
Please don't let me go no, no, hold on
'Cause I am prone to wonder
Prone to leave this faith I know
Hold on
And now they say that the wise man
Well, he fears the Lord
And this fear, well, it's the beginning of all wisdom
And I must be a fool
'Cause I sure don't seem to fear You
'Cause the very things that You will me to do
Well, I just don't seem to get around to
The very things that You hate
Are the very things that I always stumble into
Hold on
Hold on
Hold on
Hold on
'Cause I am prone to leave this faith I know
Prone to leave this God I love
Won't You hold on
Won't You hold on to me"

-Shawn McDonald

Currently listening : Simply Nothing By Shawn McDonald Release date: 10 August, 2004

Family

Current mood: happy
Category: Friends

Ever since God began to reveal Himself to me as my Father and my church (City Church) as my family (His family), things haven't quite been the same… I began to look at the people in my life, my friends from church, as more than friends, but as my family… my brothers and sisters in Christ. It has never been an issue with girls, but I do have to admit I struggled with viewing guys (cute guys especially) as my so called brothers… just as my relationship with my earthly father made it difficult for me to accept and view God as my ultimate Father, my relationship with my own brother (we are not very close) and my past relationships with the opposite sex (not healthy) have made it very difficult to view and relate to guys at church as brothers instead of a potential husband or even just a friend. God is so good and faithful to me though… it rocks my world how He takes such great care to reveal, restore, redeem, heal, transform and renew my heart and mind when it comes to my relationships with Him and His children-my family. On Sunday night, I had a breakthrough in viewing the opposite sex as brothers… as family… The GC Dance Team was practicing the conference dance in the Intern dorms and the "more advanced members" were watching and helping the "not so advanced members" (me). After a particular part, N came up to me and was like, ok, on this part you move your upper body too much, it should just be the shoulder, and on this part you move your hips too much. As you can imagine, in response I turned like ten shades of red! I was beyond mortified! I was totally and completely embarrassed! Of course I moved my upper body and hips too much, that was how I used to dance! That was the only way I knew how to dance! None of that however is now appropriate, and I have to train my body to drop those habits and "keep it holy". Anyways back to N… he totally didn't mean to embarrass me! He told me those things with a completely serious and straight face looking me in the eyes with such purity, innocence and brotherly love that it totally blew me away. I have never experienced anything like that! My first thought was, I don't want him looking at me like that and why and how can he tell me these things? My previous experience with guys "helping" and/or "teaching" me how to dance always included ulterior motives and I always felt like they were just checking me out and trying to get with me. N's motives however were squeaky clean and crystal pure… he genuinely was helping me learn the dance… I felt his love and care for me… a brother's love and care for a sister… and it totally made me want to reciprocate… what can I say? I feel like a part of the family...

Life in the Lime Light? I'll Pass...

Current mood: surprised
Category: Life

So I was talking to one of my girls from RI and telling her about the GC Dance Team and the GC Conference and how I'm in the front row for one of the dances, and she totally got excited for me and was like, wow, that's awesome, you love that stuff, that's great! Funny thing is though, that's not the same reaction I had… yea, I love the dance team and I'm psyched for the conference, but being in the front row? No way! More like freaked out! She was half right… I used to love that stuff… dancing on the stage, the spot light, the attention, the fame, all that jazz… But not anymore… I no longer seek the lime light to glorify myself and my own talents and whatnot… in fact, I avoid it… its not that I'm insecure or self conscious, no, not at all. I'm actually more secure and confident than I've ever been, but that no longer comes from me but from God. My identity and fulfillment lie in Him and I no longer feel the need to be admired, accepted and looked up to by others. My need for love, affection, and affirment come from Him alone. He is the One who completes me and satisfies me… I no longer need to seek it from other people… and its amazing how freeing and liberating it is. Also, I don't want others to see me when they look at me… I want them to see Jesus… I want to be a reflection of Him… I don't want any glory or recognition from anything I do, instead I want it all to go to Him… all the attention, all the glory, all the honor, all the praise… I want all my words and actions to point to Him…

Recently though, I've realized that even though I don't want to be in the lime light, I am. When people come up to you and say, hey I always see you everywhere or hey you're Anna right? it kind of alerts you to the fact that when you do things and you're around people, you get noticed… its not a bad thing, and even though that wasn't my intention, sometimes it feels good. But it also kind of makes me step back and say YIKES! I'm being watched LOL. I need to watch myself and be aware of what I say and do… but then again… when I'm in God's presence, I don't care who is around or how many eyes may be on me… I'll worship Him with reckless abandon because that is the sole purpose of my existence…

This is VACATION?

Current mood: tired
Category: Life

so this is my mid-winter break... nothing like i pictured it... no sleeping 'till noon, no lounging around the house in pajamas and eating my mom's food, no catching up on reading and driving around aimlessly and hitting up the mall...

instead, i'm waking up at 6 am (earlier than i do for work mind you!) and having a very intense, stimulating day of Interns (which shall have its very own blog very soon!) and church... my Bible is the only reading that gets done (which is not a bad thing), and i dont have time to "catch up" with all the people and things i was planning to... i'm out all day doing things and running (driving) around, i'm staying up late and barely having time for my beloved AOL, Aim, and Myspace... BUT GUESS WHAT?

I'M LOVING IT!

and i wouldnt have it any other way... why? because this is how God wants me to spend my vacation. my time belongs to Him, for me to do His will... His timing is perfect and He has a purpose for everything i do... and thats pretty awesome! so yea, this is the best vacation ever! i'm having the best time with the best people and most important of all... fulfilling God's plan for my life

"Jesus, I'm living for Your name, I'll never be ashamed of You! Our praise and all we are today... Take, take, take it all! Take take, take it all!"

Currently listening : Live in Seattle By Shawn McDonald Release date: 26 April, 2005