The accident didn't exactly make me see my life flashing before my eyes. I knew I wasn't going to die. Afterwards, I was grateful that we were all OK, but I wasn't really "freaked out" or "shaken up". The timing seemed weird... Right after Christmas and right before New Year's...
It did make me appreciate and value my friends and their love and concern for me. It was very touching to hear people tell me they were glad I was alive and OK. It made me just want to be around and close to those I love and those who loved me... It made me crave that fellowship, those relationships, those conversations, hugs and whatnot...
It also brought up something that I've been trying to forget and let go of for so long... Something I thought for sure was really done for this time... And yet, in the midst of this wonderful celebration of life and love, I felt a damper trying to come in and steal my joy, my purpose, my knowledge of exactly why God has protected my life... Why does it STILL have to hurt so much? Why is it taking so long to heal? I know God sees the end, but I feel like I need to see it too. I need to see the end of this...
Thank God Spirit 105.3 is back to playing their regular music! I heard this song a couple of times today and it's perfect...
Kry - Take My Hand and Walk
I know there are times
Your dreams turn to dust
You wonder as you cry
Why it has to hurt so much
Give Me all your sadness
Someday you will know the reason why
With a child-like heart
Simply put your trust in Me
Take My hand and walk where I lead
Keep your eyes on Me alone
Don't you say why were the old days better
Just because you're scared of the unknown
Take My hand and walk
Don't live in the past
'Cause yesterday's gone
Wishing memories would last
You're afraid to carry on
You don't know what's comin'
But you know the one who holds tomorrow
I will be your guide
Take you through the night
If you keep your eyes on Me
Take my hand and walk where I lead
Keep your eyes on me alone
Don't you say why were the old days better
Just because you're afraid of the unknown
Take my hand and walk where I lead
You will never be alone
Faith is to be sure of what you hope for
And the evidence of things unseen
So take my hand and walk
Just like a child
Holdings Daddy's hand
Don't let go of Mine
You know you can't stand on your own
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